Do you guys have those times where you are on top of the world and it feels like everything is falling into place? Thing with your kids are working relatively well...you have it under control....
It all goes to hell in a handbasket. In my case, I believe this is the Universe's way of telling me that I am not all that and a bag o' chips. I am probably just the crumbs in the bottom of the chips bag.
I have these times as a mom where I just feel like I am mentally retarded (no offense to anyone who actually is mentally retarded or challenged or whatever it is they are calling it these days). I truly think, though, that I am a complete dumbass when it comes to parenting at times. And I honestly do not understand how dumb people raise children without totally losing their minds. I mean, really, kids should come with a manual.
As you may recall, my son (Bam-Bam) is 2.5 years old. Which basically means that he is clinically insane and bi-polar. And I think he may actually be going through menopause. He's out of his goddamn mind. One minute he loved going pee-pee in the toilet. The next minute he is dragging his feet, pretending he doesn't hear me asking him to go potty. Then he just wants to do it with Daddy. Then he just wants to stand there and say, "No like it." All the while, of course, I have to remain calm and not pressure him - lest I totally f it all up and bring him back to square one. Which is very hard for me because I have the patience of a gnat.
Then we have the - now I think I'll have a meltdown at the store every stinkin' time we go - thing. Yeah. Yesterday we went to the mall. He did NOT want to walk inside and hold hands. No. He wanted Mommy or Daddy to hold him. Um, ok dude, you weigh 32 lbs and I have a bad back. Ain't no damn way I am carrying your little ass through the whole store. So, I tried to "prepare" him like all those useless piece of shit parenting books say. "Bam-Bam, when we get to the store you have to walk like a big boy and hold hands with Mommy." He agrees. Naturally. We get there and it is goddamn World War III. Right in the vestibule of JC Penney's. Lovely. But wait. It gets better. He eventually got over it yesterday and we went on to have a fun time at the mall. Today we went back to get shams for our new quilt (it's totally cute and a new look for our room...but I digress) and Damian (aka Bam-Bam) had yet another shit fit in the JC Penney's vestibule. This time we were in no mood for this crap. People were staring. And while those people can all suck it because they are not in my shoes, it's still embarrassing. We were "those parents" with "that kid". Happens to the best of us. Especially when the kid grows horns at a tail at approximately 18-20 months of age. We warned him that we would turn around and go home if he did not stop his behavior. He didn't stop. We left and went home. He was flabbergasted.
Anyway, this is all just grinding on me. I'm doing what I think are all the right things. It works for a while and then the little demon changes it up on me. He changes the rules. UGH! Why can't he just stay consistent. I suppose I will be asking this question for the rest of my life.
So, all you veteran parents out there - I am not too proud to ask for your help. What are some things that work for you? Or can you share a similar story so I don't feel like a complete asshole? Any insights, anecdotes, jokes, solidarity....anything. Help me not feel like a totally suck.
Six memorable summer moments I didn't blog about
6 months ago