Saturday, January 23, 2010

Barrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrf!

This post is something of a barf-o-rama. I think my friend Jen (aka. Huckdoll) likes to call it Thought Vomit. So let the purging begin. Trying to get it all out bile and all. Hot. Ok, maybe I should start over. Nah...let's keep going. My thoughts in no particular order:

Numero Uno: I have a cold for the third time in the last three months. Seriously, what the hell is up with this? Hey, at least this time it doesn't coincide with a major holiday. But for real, why does this keep happening? This is the worst I've had it in quite some time. Went 5 years without a cold before Bam-Bam was born. Oh well, better me than him. So far he remains perfectly healthy (save for the drippy boogers that he almost always has). So for this I am grateful.

Dos: I have decided that I am the crazy one. You know how you find yourself often exclaiming that someone is so crazy? Or why in the hell would she do that? Or why did she say that? etc, etc. I have decided that it's me. And it's you. We're all crazy. Or more accurately, we just don't have the perspective to see things from others point of view. So, really, you're crazy. No, I'm crazy. No, we're all crazy. And we all need to just take a chill pill and try to understand each other more. Could this make less sense? You philosophers out there will see this clearly. The rest of you - good luck.

Tres: To somewhat go along with the previous point, I have decided that it is total bullshit to judge other parents. I mean, unless you are that lady in Georgia who made her 12 year old kid kill his pet hamster with a hammer because he got bad grades, I ain't judging you. And no, I did not make that up. There are some very fucked up people out there and unfortunately you don't need any sort of skills or licensing to have a child - just the organs. Pity. I mean, you need a license to fish. Think about that. To get back to my point about judging, though, I find myself internally questioning other parents decisions all the time. Why do they let their kids sleep in their bed? Why doesn't that kid have a bed time? Why do they let the kid do this or that or whatever.... I'm quite sure they do it with me, too. I bet people wonder why my kid gets an M&M if he takes a whizz. Or why I don't just MAKE him eat his vegetables. And maybe we all do it because we're all aware that we have some shortcomings and it somehow makes us feel superior that we have some great epiphany about parenthood that our friend may not. In the end, if it works in my house or it works in your house....what the hell does anyone care? Unless I have to live in your house and deal with it, do whatever the hell you want. For real. I'm good. As long as your kids don't become serial killers, I think you're good.

No more Spanish: And so let's talk about grandparents for a second. I would like to know what that looks like exactly. Hubby and I have the lovely predicament that our Bam-Bam essentially has no grandparents. Oh, except the squeaky lady (my mom) who calls now occasionally from Tennessee and wants to pretend like she has a relationship with the kid when she barely sees him. Or wait, how about the old fart-deadbeat asshole that lives 20 minutes from our house and has seen our kid once in a year. Still, we have all kinds of cool Aunts and Uncles all around us. We don't need those wastes of space. I'm judging. Call me a hypocrite, but in this case they deserve the judgment. Trust me.

Five: I have decided that I am hopelessly addicted to Twitter, Facebook and all things involving the internet. Sometimes this is a good thing. Sometimes it really gets on my nerves. I guess it is better than being addicted to porn or black tar herion or something.

Alas, to go along with that last point I am afraid I must go. I am in the throes of assisting in planning a baby shower for my sister-in-law, which I want to be totally perfect for her. Wish me luck with that. I cringe at all of that flouncy chick stuff. But I am really, really trying. I hope it's a girl. That would really annoy my brother. Buwahahahaha!

If any of this made any sort of sense to you whatsoever and you care to comment, feel free. If not, I get it. I'm thinking it may not even make sense to me. Happy trails.

14 comments:

  1. Uno: I'm sorry you keep getting sick. Take some damn vitamins.
    Dos: I am probably more crazy than you. Like, I've been DIAGNOSED. By a professional.
    Tres: I judge other parents. Actually, I judge everyone. I believe that what works for me may not work for you but I'm still judgey.
    Four?: That sucks that your kiddo doesn't have decent grandparents. It's hard to explain it to a child but he'll get it once he's an adult.
    Five: Twitter is AMAZING. I'm cheating on my husband with Twitter.
    I love planning parties. I've hosted two baby showers (and helped plan my own) and it's totally easy. Just provide cutesie baby shit for people to look at and eat and drink and play some stupid games and everyone will have a good time.

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  2. Yes I think we are all crazy in our own little ways. I try not to judge other parents because I get so uptight when someone judges me. Like a friend made a comment a while back on a photo I posted on Facebook. My daughter had her soother in her mouth in the photo and my friends only comment was, she still has a soother? She wasn't even a year old for god's sake. But I totally get your frustration with people that shouldn't procreate. That hamster bit is horrible but sadly not surprising. We just jad a case up here where a teenage girl was found dead in her home. It was a mystery at first but just recently they discovered the step father murdered her. Not sure why yet, but really there is no good reason. All I keep wondering is where the hell is the mother in all of this. Haven't even heard her mentioned.
    I get the grandparents thing. It sucks but it's reality in a lot of situations. One lives not far and rarely comes to visit...the other is farther, phones often, but is a little nutty. Then the others live half way around the world but I am relieved to know that if they were closer, they would be overly involved.
    I am addicted to Facebook. Not so much Twitter but definitely Facebook, and all things blog. Read them religiously, get anxious if I miss a post of my own.
    And I love planning parties too. Wish more of my friends would have babies so I could do a baby shower. Hell, I just wish more of my friends had babies so my daughter would have others to interact with.
    I think this comment is longer than my last post.

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  3. Welcome fellow junkie. Hehehe...

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  4. I've just come home from a crazy 12 hour shift. I found that all highly entertaining, and if I had more brain cells that weren't quite so sleep deprived I could comment more intelligently on it all. In short, bravo.

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  5. We are all just a little bit crazy! (thank you, Seal)

    Sorry about the neverending cold, hope that finally clears up so you can enjoy Spring and Summer.

    I've been trying to convince hubs he needs to get me an aircard so I can stay connected to the Internet in areas where I can't find WiFi. He's not falling for it.

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  6. Being a working mum you are TIRED and probably just nedd a good dose of vitamin c to stop getting colds ( which by the way totally sucks!!)
    Feel free to totally baarrrrrffff up whatever comes into your head still well worth the read.
    I had no grandparents when I was growing up and really missed it and decided my kids would be different. WRONG! Even though all grandy's live in the same country and only a couple of hours away they still aren't interested. I now have grandchildren and am trying my best to have regular contact.
    Keep up the great blogging. (also addicted to facebook) xx

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  7. Sometimes, you just have to let the vomit out. ;)

    And I agree with you on the whole not judging others parenting. I so try not to do this. I try really, really hard.

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  8. I'm at a lose for words because of the hamster tragedy. How could you make your kid kill their pet...with a hammer???

    WTF!!!


    Hugs and Mocha,
    Stesha

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  9. That was some wonderful thought vomit! Doesn't it feel good to spew like that sometimes?

    I agree with you about all taking a chill pill and understanding each other, it's like, the key to happiness, understanding and empathy. I sure hope people eventually catch onto that concept :)

    Sorry to hear about your consecutive colds, that sucks and reminds me of myself last year except I had bronchitis twice, pneumonia once and colds almost every 3 weeks. This year, nothing :)

    I hope you're feeling better soon maybe with some longer days and nicer weather?

    xo

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  10. I wanted to briefly speak to your "no grandparents (or good ones so to speak)" comment... Personally, I had all four grand parents as a young child, but my younger brother has none, and you know what THAT'S OKAY because he has plenty of people in his life that love him unconditionally, make him feel special, and spoil the heck out of him. it doesn't have to be grandparents that love a child that way; it can be Aunts, Uncles, and FRIENDS that provide that additional love! :-)

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  11. Love the thought vomit! I also love how open you are. Let it roll.

    I am also crazy. Completely.

    As far as Grandparents go... I didn't grow up with any that really cared enough to know me either. My kids, however, have the opposite situation. and it's a PROBLEM. I know we are blessed to have lots of people who love them, but it's been detrimental to our marriage. Both sides fighting for control/time with the kids. It's really sick, actually.

    I hope that Bam-Bam's Grandparents do see the light sooner than later, that would be lovely. Until then, just keep loving him like you are, that's all he needs. You are a fantastic mother.

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  12. Yep, we're all our own brand of crazy. You're completely right. Isn't it great that we love each other anyway?? :)

    I miss you! Let's get something on the calendar.

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  13. My girls have an uncle on the "other" side who has never met Sophie. She's 11!

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  14. I love this Blog :) We are always saying at work that we are the only normal ones. But sometimes, just sometimes, I start to wonder if the majority rules and we are the mental ones?

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